Thursday, March 30, 2006

CELEBRATING LIFE CHOICES, OR NOT...


Sometimes an idea takes hold almost without me noticing. The first trickle...A few weeks ago when I was struck down with a cold I watched the episode of Sex and the City (series 6) called
'A woman's right to shoes'. In this episode Carrie is subjected to attending yet another baby party for which she must bring a gift. We see a montage of Carrie on many occasions choosing gifts from wedding and baby shower lists, looking fabulous each time of course.

Then when she turns up at the latest baby party (with enormous gift) she is asked to take off her shoes, or rather Manolo's. As if this isn't bad enough they get stolen by another guest. The hostess 'mommy' is unconcerned by this and refuses to give her the $485 to cover the cost of her shoes, shaming her for being extravagant and not having 'a real life'. Carrie then calculates that with the cost of attending this woman's hen party, wedding, buying a wedding gift and baby showers she has spent over $2000 on her. And that if she were to stay unmarried without children she would get absolutely nada in return. And as Carrie says 'birthdays don't count, everyone has those.' (I'm not complaining, as I just turned 30 and received oodles of lovely presents. But after 30, er if I stay single there's nothing left to celebrate? This can't be.)

So, our heroine Carrie starts a registry at Manolo Blahnik with one item on it - the shoes, and informs the bitch that she is marrying herself. HA!

This episode really struck a chord with me, I'm sure I'd seen it before but right now the inference that seems to be everywhere is that I should be settled (hmm, funny how the word settle can be used in place of compromise) down by now, or desperately trying to be.

So the second trickle...yesterday R and I were having a conversation over tea and tartelettes at Maison Bertaux about wedding lists. We were discussing how nice it would be if everyone could have a list anyway without having to do all the marriage/baby bit. Just for being well, you. For all those things that you'd never buy for yourself. Are you really ever going to treat yourself to a silver dinner service? Or does not getting married mean you must pay for your freedom by using mismatching ikea/flea market cutlery forever? I admit it's a small price to pay for not spending your life in an unhappy marriage with a complete freak. But wouldn't it be great? It would have to have a catchy name but I can't think of one.
Carrie came up with 'congratulations you didn't marry the wrong guy!' So far I have 'well done for getting this far without relying on anyone' or 'hooray you spared us from another double buggy clogging up the pavements'. They don't exactly trip off the tongue do they? I feel some drunken brainstorming is needed.

The third trickle...later on, after my conversation with R, I was reading Relookage after Julia commented here. There is a 'Lust-Haves' section on her blog and it looks like people (although she is not actually asking for people to buy her things) are granting her wishes.
Well done, girl!

I am now off to enquire about having Lola baptised. Of course there'll have to be a party. The list will be here.
source

2 comments:

Julia said...

Yay! I'm so chuffed reading this! As I told you this is my favourite episode and I always feel so great right at the end when she hops over the puddle with a confident stride - that's what it's all about.

Another name for it could be, "I'm single and fabulous" because it's our fabulousness that needs to be celebrated.

Anonymous said...

...actually I was tempted to put expensive shoes on my wedding registry, but then my fiancé said no. I had to make do with boring china and cutlery sets. What if I become single again? Can I throw a "newly single" party and get fabulous presents all over again?
Pensively yours,
Mia